Pressing On

I am currently reading a book that was placed in my hands nearly three years ago. It's funny how God places something in your life with divine timing in mind. The book sat next to my bedside in Florida untouched all this time...only to be picked up and brought back to Texas with me on my last visit. (still with no intent to read anytime soon, feeling almost confused as to why I even grabbed it last minute and packed it into my carry-on bag) haha. God is cool. 

Now only two chapters in...I see once again that GOD'S PLAN IS NOT FAULTY! He really knows what he's doing with divine time and providence and all that jazz. He's good. period. 

What is the book? Yes...a woman's book, "Having a Mary Spirit." Why am I defining it as a "woman's book?" Well i suppose just because of the feminine cover and author...but hey, it really is incredible for anyone (if you dare gentlemen.) lol ...But hey, if you don't dare, I understand as well (since the cover is half the reason I wasn't interested in the first place.) I don't know... there is just something about cliche "women's books," sometimes, that really don't draw me in? But hey... "DON'T JUDGE A BOOK BY IT'S COVER!"... Great childhood lesson, I've obviously struggled to tackle. 

ANYWAYS...the book... woo...it-is-for-me! The concluding section of chapter two touches on something so important, "Pressing On!"

Philippians 3:12-14 Paul says, "but i press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind me and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

Author Joanna Weaver says this: (straight out of the book) 

I press on. Those words echo in my heart, bringing me comfort and courage. No, I haven't achieved all my goals. I'm not yet perfect. I'm still a recovering Pharisee in many ways, still more eager to whitewash the outside of my life that to do the hard work of cooperating with God's inner renovation. But rather than giving in to the enemy's condemnation of my shortcomings, I am determined to "press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me." 

My deepest fear is waking up twenty years from now still the same woman I am today. With the same annoying habits and petty attitudes; with the same besetting sins and false beliefs. I can't imagine anything more terrible that getting to the end of my life only to discover that God has so much more in mind for me-more freedom, more joy, more peace, more true effectiveness. And I missed it all, simply because I refused to change. 

So I press on, and I hope you will too. Believe me, dear sister, we can trust God. If we allow the spotlight of heaven to shine on the dark recesses of our souls, God will scrub off the old layers of whitewash. He'll remove those pockets of Martha drivenness and Pharisee pride. By the power of His Holy Spirit, He will transform us from glory to glory (2 Corinthians 3:18 NKJV) 

Until one day, to our surprise, we'll wake up and realize that we look just like...Jesus! 

(Hm...isn't that from 1 John3:2?)

I'm not saying it will be easy. Or fully accomplished here on Earth. Even with God doing the real work, we'll have to cooperate. We will have to change, and change hurts. 

But i can promise you this. It hurts good. 

What is God doing in your life? It is okay that everything isn't all perfect at once. It is a process. But it is important that we keep pressing on. Don't get so discouraged that all your ducks aren't in a perfect row? :) Step by step...day by day. As Weaver said,  He knows I would be completely undone if He revealed all my sin at once. Like someone peeling an onion, the Lord reveals one layer of sin in my life at a time. He gently exposes my failings, my prejudice, and my pride. Then He invites me ot repent. To turn away from my destructive bent. TO take advantage of His grace and the new paths of life He shows me. 

And then, step by step, to move toward becoming what I was meant to be."

Leadership

Tonight marks one week left of my first year in Masters Commission USA. Wow. I can not believe the speed of time. But that is not what I want to talk about... I will enjoy to the fullest my last week of this stage of life and take the end as it comes! (ahh! denial? haha) 

But anyways...tonight... tonight was an awesome night. We met at my directors, Ben and Becky's, brand new home. They just closed on it and its their very first house since being married. I am so happy for them. The way God has blessed them blesses me. So tonight all of Master's and staff met in the empty living room of Ben and Becky's new home. We hung out/toured the house, discussed different things, we even made a time capsule to be opened in ten years, then the staff members began to one by one speak into Ben and Becky's lives and sincerely thank them for this year and all they've given and experienced together as a team. It was great. But what I want to talk about is this- 

Leadership.

My discipleship director, Ben McLennan, shows an incredible example of leadership. After everyone thanks him, an emotional time that brought him and his wife to tears. He gathered the entire team...the team of nearly 100 in which he loves and makes count for each individual...he calls us all into a huddle. And then, he just takes a knee. He kneels down before his team, and kinda just puts his head downward and quietly tells us that he is honored to be in the presence of such greatness. So honored, he must kneel before us all. 

The humility shown in that, broke me. Who am I, that my leader would kneel before me just because of who I am? Not even because of what any one of us has done. But because of who we are, Ben found it fit to kneel before us in honor. 

I am incredibly honored to be led by such humility. Through example of leadership like that, in addition to personal experiences of trial and error this year, and things God has personally spoken and revealed to me while leading or following... I see that the best leader is one who believes in his team 110%. Leading isn't just about confidence in you to stand up in front of the pack. It is about being confident enough in God, to be confident in the people He's given you. To be humble enough to believe that the team can and will win. You've been brought along to help but if you believe that YOU are giving the win, you're wrong. You have been given a winning team, but will you help them realize it?... or will you teach them to live in the doubt that leads to failure? 

Leadership requires sincere humility.

Simple Truth

Nothing in this life can even compare to a close relationship with Jesus Christ. Really, nothing. 

When I feel far, it's like nothin' else matters till we're back together...

It's been a while...

After a couple of very difficult months of refusing to pour out much of anything onto a computer screen... I am back! to say this- and to say it strong:

1 Corinthians 2:9...

No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him.

Do not worry about the future or wallow in the difficulties of today. :)

You have no idea what is about to come!

I missed you, bloggers. But hey, I'm back!

LOVE 

is what we need

Grace

We Do Need Each Other

James 5:15-16 says: And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. 

Tonight I experienced something very liberating. With God's help and push, I was able to be honest with a close friend of mine and allow her to keep me accountable. I believe that is the purpose of verse 16. We need to be honest with our brothers and sisters in order to receive the kind of help we need from them. Tonight were able to put this very verse of confessing to one another and praying effectively for each other into action. 

God doesn't give us advice that might work. His word never returns void! (Isa. 55:11)  So...it's really a beautiful thing when it is put into action. Tonight, thanks be to God, I've found freedom in my mind, in my heart, and in this very important relationship.

Woo! I literally FEEL better. :)

Thank you Jesus.

Anything you've been trying to hold back? 

I know it's definitely not always easy, but as always said, I think honesty really is the best policy. I know I can't do this on my own. Let's help each other out the way we were intended.

"I'M IN LOVE! I'M IN LOVE! ...AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!"

I usually like to write in depth, kind of lengthy, at times-thought provoking blogs. haha But tonight- I am just dying to make one simple yet very complicated point...I AM IN LOVE!!!! I am so deeply, madly, crazy, passionately in love with a God that knows exactly the song of my heart. He sings over me and showers me in his love, leaving me with no choice but to retaliate. He uses the simplest of things to turn my world upside down. He literally paints the sky just to put a smile on my face. He aligns every step of my day so that I might just pass that sign at the right moment, or hear that song just when I begin to doubt. He is doing everything He can to show me how he feels. I want to sit and be with him, gaze into his eyes, listen to his voice and consume his every word...forever. Tonight, I laugh at every obstacle that may try and take this love away-I pray against it because you know what, its going no where. This love is a forever, eternal, never failing LOVE.

  

GOD, take me deeper. :)         

This morning I woke up with this thought...Why is it that when you're in love... I mean really in love...you feel so compelled to write a letter? And it's like you can't just type a letter, or speak to the person, or show them through actions how you feel. I mean, yes, that is all a part of the expression of love. But on top of all that, it's like this compelling urge that rises up out of a person-to WRITE about it. 

As this generation often does when looking for an opinion on a subject- i googled it. "Love letters"...found this quote-"Often letters are preferable to face-to-face contact because they can be written as the thoughts come to the author. This may allow feelings to be more easily expressed than if the writer were in the beloved's presence." Hm...interesting. I write my letters to my beloved, in his presence. He stays invisible enough for me to appear as if I'm alone but in reality he actually holds me as I pour out my heart. His presence actually helps pull the beauty and truth of how I feel for him out from the depths of my heart. I write and write and its a great release. But in the end, it's more than a feeling. It's more than I can express in words. I have to give him everything, all of me, all of my heart. He works everyday, softening my heart, melting me, to the point of complete surrender. My favorite part about writing to my beloved is that with every word, he has this way of making me love him more by the end of the letter.

Recommended read: 1 John 4

verse 16 says this: And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. 

As Paul prayed for the Ephesians- I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

Let's Get Back to Basics <3

Matthew 18

At about the same time, the disciples came to Jesus asking, "Who gets the highest rank in God's kingdom?" For an answer Jesus called over a child, whom he stood in the middle of the room, and said, "I'm telling you, once and for all, that unless you return to square one and start over like children, you're not even going to get a look at the kingdom, let alone get in. Whoever becomes simple and elemental again, (humbles himself-NIV) like this child, will rank high in God's kingdom. What's more, when you receive the childlike on my account it's the same as receiving me. 

Isn't it time we become childlike again in our love? Not just toward family but towards everyone in our life. 

When I was a child I often made statements such as, 

"You're the best dad/mom in the WHOLLLE world!" 

I remember that every morning of second grade, during the "moment of silence," I would quickly pray, "God, help me not to be scared and to feel like mom is right beside me today." 

I often told my sister that she was my hero. And my brother and I saved the seat beside us for each other on the school bus everyday. 

When the teacher needed something, there was nothing wrong with raising your hand eagerly to help. When a friend didn't understand something, it was okay to set down what I was doing and help her get it. 

As a child, love was so evident. Love was genuine. It was patient. Quick to be given. Pure. 

Now-things don't always seem quite as simple. The world has made the impression as you get older that loving that way shows weakness and makes you vulnerable or weak. A friend of mine said it like this, "It's like we work so hard all those years just to grow up and when we finally get there- we work the rest of our life trying to get back to the childlike heart."

Love hasn't changed. We have.

Maybe by a series of event...or hurts or false judgements. 

But today is new! I am new! In Christ we can all be made new.

(2 Cor. 5:17 - Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone and the new has come!)

He loves us enough to change our hearts if only we'll be humble enough to let him. It doesn't have to take a lifetime.

Let's get back to basics. 

****************************************************************

Ezekiel 11:19

I will give them an undivided heart and put a new spirit in them; I will remove from them their heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh. 

Realizing What You've Already Got

           

We constantly ask for upgrades. We forget the worth of what we already have.

Family.

Is yours disfunctional?

broken?

"crazy"?

It seems like such a common prayer to ask God to fix what we've got. 

How often do we just thank him for what he's already given us?

Maybe your circumstance isn't perfect. 

But at least there is a circumstance.

I have a family. A safe, alive, healthy, loving family.

Could things be better?

Sure.

Do I believe they will be better?

Yes!

But do I have reason to complain?

No way!

God, I Thank you so much for my family. For my parents who raised me with love and instilled the fear of you and passion for you within my heart. Right now we may not all be together but I know that we are united in our hearts because we all have one thing in common- you live with us and in us. Thank you for placing me where you have in life. I appreciate the hand you've dealt me and I wouldn't trade my cards for the world. You know the desires of my heart and I am learning more of yours daily. Let your will be done. 

Jordan- My best friend. You are one of the most beautiful people I have ever known. Your love is genuine and you are not afraid to show it. You work so hard and I am so proud of you for stepping out of the old and into the new this year in your life. Keep going! God is with you every step of the way. 

Joe- You are one of a kind. You are hilarious. My love for you only grows as we grow. I believe in the promises God has for you and I will never stop saying, "Look how far you've come!" This is only the start.

Daddio- You show such great balance in being a real, hardworking, disciplined man, but with the most soft, loving bear hugs and smiles. :) Your constant support means more than you know.

Mom- As I grow up I realize how much influence you've truly had on me as a person. I'm already saying things I never thought I would! haha You are one of the strongest people I know and I am always believing alongside with you in the dreams and visions God gives you. To sum it up I have to say, "thank you."

Love you all,

Grace

Just thinking today...

Doesn't it seem like we so often turn our life into a set of deadlines..? It's like in everything we are always looking for the next thing. Like for instance...the expectation of Christmas. We count down from pretty much the day after Thanksgiving, every day, until the 25th. Then we count the days till the new year begins. With a new year- for students, they count the days till school lets out for summer, while other people count the days until the weekend off from work, or until the promotion, or until the big event next month, or until you get married, or until you move, or until dinner is ready, or until that movie comes out etc...etc..etc.. 

When does the counting stop and the enjoying the present moment begin? 

I am actually really happy to be where I am right now. I know it's going to be better and get better but right now is actually really great too.

"I can't wait till ______"  or "Only __ days till ____" is something I often think or verbalize. But man how often do I say "This moment right now, I will never forget." "This day is one of the best days." Or "God, thank you for this hour and what you are doing in my life right this minute." 

Jesus came so that you may have life and have it to the fullest. (John 10:10)

 That isn't a promise made for ten years down the road. It's for right now if we'll only accept it. 

Just something to think about...

Are you thankful for today? 

Are you embracing life to its fullest right now? 

Honestly, I think I need to work on it.

What's in a name

Grace.

happens to be my name. 

But that's not at all what this is about.

God's Grace. His gift to us. 

Man, it's hard for me to understand.

Please share with me what you think of it...?

Grace that restores 

Grace that redeems

Grace that repairs visions and dreams

Grace that releases miracles!

( If Not For Your Grace by Israel Houghton&New Breed- A Deeper Level)

Just to think...Really...where would I be with out it?